Electric God
by Catherine Ryan Hyde
Book Description:
Hayden Reese once had it all: a wife he loved completely, a daughter he adored, and a son on the way. And then, little by little, his life came undone.
When his son died at birth, the anger Hayden had been supressing ever since the accidental death of his brother could no longer be contained. Little by little, the rage against life and God cost him his marriage, his family and his freedom.
As Electric God begins, Hayden, newly released from jail, is living a marginal life in a remote California town. He has just buried his dog--the thing he loved most in the world--and now finds that he is losing Laurel, the only person with whom he's had a relationship in years. It seems that God is not quite through with him.
But when a figure from his past turns up, Hayden is forced to re-visit and re-evaluate his life. Perhaps at last he might reach an understanding as to why he has been tested so harshly by this seemingly cavalier God.
First paragraph:
Hayden Resse picked his way on foot in the dark, straight uphill into national forest territory, his Jenny dangling heavy on his right shoulder. Still supple she felt, and almost warm. His only little bit of comfort.
In his left hand, the shovel.
This story opens in present-day and introduces Hayden Reese, a quiet cowboy-type man of 50 who is living in a tiny shack on the outskirts of a small town. But despite his normally tame demeanor, Hayden is a man struggling to contain violent outbursts and unreconciled childhood pain. His girlfriend, Laurel, has just gone back to her husband and in typical male fashion, the two men butt heads (fight) when they're brought together. But when Laurel's daughter disappears with her teenaged boyfriend, it is Hayden that Laurel runs to to bring her back. In true chivalrousness, Hayden drives a great distance to retrieve Peg and once he finds her, gets tied up in a rescue operation more dangerous than any of them imagined. Violence once again escapes him, only this time to his advantage. He and Peg return safely but now Peg has developed a case of hero worship and becomes delusional about their relationship. When Laurel's husband discovers the goings on between Hayden and the rest of his family, he puts a stop to it all with a shotgun.
The middle third of this book takes the reader back in time, to Hayden's childhood. It's backstory that reveals the boy behind the stoic facade. Hayden and his little brother Daniel are growing up in a small town, under the emotionally-distant and somewhat cruel disciplinary methods of their father.
"Where's Daniel?"
"I don't know, sir. I haven't seen him since Bible studies."
"You don't know."
"No sir."
"I ask you where your brother is and you just don't know."
"No sir. Sorry."
Hayden stood on the boards of the front porch, eyes trained down to the faded brown paint. His father stood in the doorway, blocking him, one massive shoulder leaning on the door frame. Unrolling a pack of Camels from the short sleeve of his crisply starched white shirt, he shook one filterless cigarette out, lit it slowly with a cardboard match, cupping his hands around the flame. He towered above Hayden while he waited.
Daniel is their father's favorite, and Hayden never can seem to measure up. He is in charge of monitoring Daniel, making sure the younger boy stays out of trouble--to a degree that interferes with Hayden's own personal life. When he gets a shot at a real date, Hayden decides that just this once, Daniel will be okay on his own--a fatal mistake that ruins both their lives. The guilt festers inside of Hayden as he ages, even indirectly affecting his marriage many years later. When Hayden finds his teenage daughter abandoned in the city by her boyfriend after she denied him sex, Hayden snaps. He tracks the boy down at school and the ensuing attack lands him in jail.
The third section of this book returns us to the present day, when Hayden awakes from a coma against the odds, and begins a long journey of recovery. His daughter has returned while he was unconscious, and with her all the old unhealed issues from the past.
The writing is pretty and vivid, (The Arabians ran like they'd just been waiting for an excuse. They threw their heads high and raised their tails into flags, and now and then the broke gait, down into a long, extended trot that covered a remarkable amount of ground.) and displays the flat states and small towns in all their bleak glory. Hayden's personal growth does not come easy, but neither does he come off as helpless or feminine--which pleased me greatly as the story is written by a woman author. Hayden is a ruff and rugged hero, full of inner torment, physical pain, and very strong moral codes.
"There are two different kinds of leaders, my friend. Two different ways to lead. Nobody really knows which kind they are until they're in battle and pinned down, and it's clear there will be losses. Say you're in battle and you have five men under you. And you care for them all. You want that no one should be lost. But you find you have to sacrifice one of your men."
"No good leader sacrifices one of his men."
"That might not be true. Without that sacrifice maybe everyone will die. That man and the others as well. Then what?"
"Nobody should be sacrificed."
He struggles to accept change, and is stubborn, and is at once both the protector and in need of protecting. I enjoyed his character and the moral issues that were presented and worked through--having to use brains instead of brawn, and learning to trust and share himself.
"It's such a mess."
"What is?"
"My chest. I don't even like to look at it myself."
"Can I see?"
"No."
"I didn't think so. You always wanted to keep things from me. Anything you thought I wouldn't like about you. You always wanted to spare me your messes. But it's part of what always kept us apart from each other, I think."
"We weren't always apart from each other."
"In some ways we were."
And the biggest lesson of all:
"Think you can ever forgive me for that?"
"I know I couldn't have at the time. But we're a lot older now. We've had a lot of time to think."
"I'm not sure you can think your way through forgiveness."
Four out of five stars for characterization, transformation, emotion and tone
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